Home Celebrity Buzz ‘Dear Bianca, this pain is too much’: Inside Riky Rick’s suicide notes

‘Dear Bianca, this pain is too much’: Inside Riky Rick’s suicide notes

Hip hop star Riky Rick reportedly left three suicide notes to his wife – Bianca Naidoo and his children – Maik and Jordan before he ended his life last Wednesday morning.

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The suicide notes were reportedly shared by a source close to the star.


Riky Rick whose real name is Rikhado Makhado reportedly left heartbreaking messages to the mother of his children – Bianca Naidoo and his children Maik and Jordan.

A source informed Sunday World that the star prayed for his family’s understanding and forgiveness for taking his own life.

He’s also asked for his family to not blame themselves for ending his life.

The father of two struggled with depression for years and couldn’t live with it anymore.

The publication adds that he hanged himself with a rope in his music studio garage where his wife and his management team found him.

The letter to his wife reads:

“Dear Bianca, this pain is too much. I don’t want you to blame yourself for my life being unbearable.”

“This was the greatest period of my life. You gave me more love than I deserved.”

“Please do not blame yourself. Live your life. Don’t hide the light you gave me every day.”

He also apologised for giving up and said he’s sorry for being the one who gave up.

“The pain I feel is too much to deal with. The voices in my head have never gone away.”

“I wish I was stronger but I am not. Please forgive me. I love you so much. Be happy. Smile. Everything is okay now.”


The article also states that the father of two also apologised to his son – Maik who wants to be like him.

He pleads with his son to follow his own passion:

“The other night Maik said he wants to be just like me. Not better in the sense of useless achievement, but better as in choosing the right path for his heart.”

“Follow your passions, my son. Your world is bigger than anything you could ever imagine. I love you.”

He tells his daughter Jordan that she’s the best thing that’s ever happened to him.

“Jordan, the best thing that ever happened in my life. You taught me so much about myself.”

“Thank you for being so good to me. Thank you for being such an inspiration to me. I love you. I’m sorry.”

“Keep each other close. Love each other. Please don’t blame yourself. I cannot take the pain. I love you. “